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I have begun at day one countless times over the years. I have made countless mistakes, but I have come to do one thing right that gets me effectively launched into the first few months of sobriety - and I’m refining it. That is developing the Mind-Body Connection.
Sometimes you see YouTube bodybuilders or calisthenics athletes talking about this, but I think it’s really underrated for getting started as a person that generally practices self-care. I think that we can probably agree that we often stop drinking at least to a partial extent because we desire to feel better. Not super or spectacular, but just better. Sick and tired of sick and tired, amiright?
Anyway, I see a lot of people floating around the internets struggling to start. Since I’m quite overdue to make a positive contribution, I will try today. These are just my opinions, and I’m no professional - except in starting at Day 1.
The physical progression of well-being is split into two tracks - Intake and Output. Intake is nutritional balance and hydration, and I’ll tackle that another time. Let’s suffice to say that odds are that you should at least double your water intake and eat more whole vegetables. From there, let’s look at Output. This is another way to say exercise, but I don’t want you to think about gyms and influencers and being motivated to sweat at 5AM blah blah blah. We don’t want a whole ordeal, we want a starting point for first steps. When we feel good within the context of the basics, then we can do more. This is the road to mastery in anything, no?
Here is the Output ramp as I see it: Breathing Movement Mobility Stamina Strength Bonus Points for Fun
So, why start with Breathing. I think that, by and large, the modern human doesn’t breathe well. This is because we experience a wildly miscalibrated threat response and an intense distraction flooding in our daily lives. When the human is stressed, they tend to pause the breathing cycle. Evolutionarily, this makes it easier to hear. In the world 10k years ago, the sound of your own breath could actually be enough to obscure other sounds. You see it in dogs when they pay sharp attention - they stop panting. You also notice this stuff when camping, for instance. Or when city dwellers struggle to get comfortable in places that are “too quiet.”
We breathe shallowly and without cyclical stability. We breathe like amateurs. If I pay attention to my breathing, I am automatically experiencing a link between my mind and body. That makes step zero in feeling better to simply pay attention to your breathing. Expand and deepen it in traffic or at work. You might find that you feel more focused or more powerful quite quickly. This simple foundation is the bedrock under the pyramid that may one day stand.
Movement is another continuation or expansion of things that we simply fall out of tune with in our daily lives. Many of us spend too much time sitting and too much time stationary in general - by a lot. Broadly speaking, we’re built by evolution to move around and do stuff. We’re also driven by evolution to conserve energy when possible, so this is one of those conflicts in modern life that we have to navigate.
If you are a Step 0 person (and perhaps even if you aren’t), here is where we can start to put together useful things. When you get up tomorrow morning, I want you to try something. When you wake up and kill that alarm, open your eyes as wide as you can. Take 4 very deep, very slow breaths. Sit up. Stretch slowly uppppp and hold for 1.. 2.. 3.. Keep breathing. Rotate left (...1…2…3) and then right (...1…2…3) and keep breathing. Chin up and nice roll-back of the neck (...1…2…3). Stand up, and slowly stretch arms wide (...1…2…3). Squat slowly down and sink into it (...1…2…3). If possible, put your heels down as you squat to help pull the stretch through (...1…2…3). Congratulations, you have started your morning with mindfulness and mind-body connection. With Breathing and Movement. It’s a step in the right direction.
If any of that stuff was even marginally more challenging than expected (or challenging at all, actually), then hooray for you! - you are a modern human with modern human body stuff going on. In order to facilitate Movement, we have a tandem feature that needs some attention. That would be Mobility.
The chair is a relatively novel item in the human lexicon of comfort. In the before-times, our options were moving, standing, lying down, or some version of sitting cross-legged or lounging in some sort of recline. The chair is a shortcut to allow us to take a load off our feet and avoid some of the joint stress that other non-lying options apply. It puts us into a convenient position to examine stationary information, which is also relatively new to the human experience.
What all this stuff means is that we are in a position to suffer a sort of lifestyle disorder that corrodes our mobility. Our body has a position that it uses a lot, and it develops accommodations to that expectation by letting other stuff go. Sitting in a chair robs us of core stability (hello there, you Swiss-Ball-as-an-office-chair weirdos - you are geniuses) and it gives us a forward slump. Why do so many of us have bad backs and crackling joints at 33? Side eye at chair.
What to do about it? YouTube is your best buddy here. There are literally thousands of videos for this. If you can bring yourself to do that lil sequence above, here is where you add on. I like this for a starter He’s a typical influency-type of guy, but try to look past it and take useful things in.
I have used about all the time I have to write this up today, so I’ll come back tomorrow and go over the rest of the list. Everything is just lastthing + 1, basically. This starting point can also be your personal end point! We don’t have to maximize everything, and I think it’s kind of a toxic modern attitude to orient ourselves that way. If this makes you feel good (it will) then enjoy that and get on with your life. It’s something like 0.35% of the time available in your day, so I challenge you to find a better ROI!
The keypoint of all this for me is that my mind-body connection strengthens my sobriety. It’s not just a great bonus but a functional reality that if I don’t pay adequate attention to what my body tells me, I am more vulnerable to my own shadow monsters!
IWNDWYT

Hello lovely readers,
Welcome to the second and final discussion of Ducks: Two Years in the Oil Sands by Kate Beaton. This autobiographical comic was Canada Reads (an annual "battle of the books") winner for 2023. You can read the first discussion here.
Summary
The story picks up one month after that horrible party. Kate sleeps with Mike. She continues to get weird sexual comments from the men she works with, but she has started to laugh the comments off. Many of the men seem to have problems with her giving them orders, and her superiors get pissy with her for minor things or for wanting ‘special treatment’. Joe, a fellow Nova Scotian, overhears her swearing in frustration and tells her that everyone at the mine is just yelling at the guy next to them for work they’re not doing themselves, but that people tend to be friendlier to people from their own region of Canada. Kate wonders aloud to Doug whether the oil sands make people better or worse.
The men at the mine have heard that Kate’s ‘little friends’ (her sister Becky and friend Lindsay) are going to be joining them, and she warns them to leave them alone. When Becky and Lindsay arrive, they are wearing skirts and they quickly notice the staring and weird behaviour from the men on site. Kate apologises for it, and they wonder why she is saying sorry.
Kate tells Becky and Lindsay that the other men have been leaving her alone since most people know about her and Mike, and they tell her it’s because in their eyes she’s ‘claimed’.
They take a trip to Gregoire Beach, but Kate doesn’t wear a swimsuit or go swimming. Becky asks her what’s up with her, as she’s noticed something is wrong. Kate talks about how everything at the beach seems so normal, but that she isn’t. However, she doesn’t explain further.
Kate looks for other jobs online, and sees a post for a job at the Maritime Museum of British Columbia in Victoria, the capital of British Columbia.
Not long afterwards, she sees the man who forced himself on her at that party. He and the group of men he’s with see her and they start laughing.
Kate hears a man playing Peter’s Dream on his guitar, and joins in singing the song.
She goes to Becky’s room and tells her that she needs to leave the oil sands for a while, even though she and Lindsay have just arrived. She asks her to promise that she and Lindsay will look out for each other, and finally tells her about the assaults. Becky tells her that it wasn’t her fault, and wishes she had been there sooner to protect her as that’s her job as the big sister. She tells Kate that it happened to her too, at her university dorm. She tells Kate she should go.
We leave the oil sands, for a year in Victoria. Kate gets the museum job but it’s no more than 21 hours per week, so she gets a second job. In a coffee shop, she hears the song An Innis Aigh playing, and tells a woman who was wondering aloud about the language that it’s Gaelic.
Victoria seems like a nicer place than the oil sands, but it isn’t perfect – the city big problems with homelessness and mental health, but none of the old, rich people living there care [read runner note – according to Victoria’s Wikipedia page, the city is known for its disproportionately large retiree population. Some 23.4% of the population of Victoria and its surrounding area are over 65 years of age, which is higher than the overall Canadian distribution of over 65 year-olds in the population (19%). A historically popular cliché refers to Victoria as the home of "the newly wed and nearly dead"]. Kate is fired from her job for not taking American money and not wanting to sell the merchandise badly enough. One of her colleagues (I think?) sees her drawing a comic, and suggests that she should make a website.
Kate tells her parents that on her days off she works at a grocery store, and her father wonders what her degree was for. Shortly afterwards, she is fired from the grocery store for yawning and ‘being surly’. She goes on a date, but panics when the guy tries to kiss her at the end.
Kate can’t get a reprieve from her student loan payments, even though she paid half of it off the previous year with her oil sands earnings. She decides to go back to the oil sands to pay the rest off, and says goodbye to the museum.
After that brief reprieve, we’re back in the oil sands, this time at Shell Albian Sands. Kate has taken a job in the warehouse office, and her living quarters are a bit fancier than at the previous sites. The site also has a Tim Hortons, Wi-Fi and a gym, even yoga classes. Lindsay tells her that a lot of the warehouse crew from Long Lake have moved up there too. One of her new colleagues is Hatim, who is creepy in a new way, plaguing her with messages despite having a wife and children.
The team get a congratulations message with a gif for achieving three million man hours without a lost time incident (LTI). Kate’s boss, Ryan, tells her that they don’t have LTIs at the site because they look bad for the company, I guess implying that they cover them up.
She sees Doug again, who seems to feel that she’s all high and mighty now with her office job, and struggles with her ‘bossing him’ since she’s younger than him (and presumably because she’s female). When she has to cover a warehouse shift, Doug laughs about how she’s down from on high and has gone soft. He tells her that he sang with The Men of the Deeps and even sang for the queen, which she doubts because he has a terrible voice. She sings a bit of Coal Town Road (which I’m kind of disappointed doesn’t sound like Old Town Road) and asks if she could be in the choir too, but he seems annoyed about her singing a mining song when she’s not a miner.
Kate’s sister Becky is still working at Long Lake, but lives in Fort McMurray, and Kate goes to meet her there; she says it’s much better than living in the camp. She tells Kate, that one time a guy jumped out of the closet in her room, but she was able to kick him out. She always locked her door, but often heard the handle jiggling at night. She even had a stalker, who managed to get into her room with a bottle of alcohol and suggested doing body shots – she didn’t report it, but when he got fired everyone thought she had.
Kate struggles to read some of the order sheets because many of the workers are bad spellers or have unclear handwriting; many of the older men at the mine left school in grade six. Lindsay tells her about one of the lead hands from Newfoundland, who can’t read, and was humiliated by the other workers when they tried to make him read the safety memo aloud so they could laugh at him. Lindsay says she’s never seen a grown man ashamed like that, and they discuss how he’s one of the nicest guys there.
A group from the Calgary office visits the mine site, and Kate has to find the nice hard hats and safety vests for the visitors, the ones the actual workers can’t have because they’re too fancy. Basically, they have to put on a show for the head office people – everyone has to look sharp, make things tidier than normal etc. One of the visitors takes a photo of Kate. After they leave, Damian asks if he can have one of the fancy new vests, but they were taken back to Calgary even though they don’t need them at head office.
Kate continues doing her comics, and her colleagues occasionally read them. Ryan finds some of them in the scanner, which she had used to upload them to her website, and tells her not to leave her stuff lying around at work.
Becky and Kate discuss what it would have been like if their father had gone out to the oil sands to work when they were children, as many people did. They wonder if he would have been like the other men they work with, and how they must all be normal at home. Kate says she tries to remember that there are a lot of men who don’t bother her, but she doesn’t remember them because they’re not the ones in her face.
Their safety lectures tell them basic information about how ice is slippery and is all over the ground, which presumably every Canadian already knows. One of the men remarks that it’s not about safety, but an arse-covering exercise so that a worker can’t sue them if they fall. Kate doodles a pony in her notebook (thank you u/Amanda39 for linking to this comic in last week’s discussion!).
Many of the staff have families that they don’t see very often. One of the men gets a phonecall from his wife’s phone, which he answers thinking it’s an emergency as she never calls during the day; it turns out to be his young son, who is calling to see when he’s coming home next.
Brian asks Kate if she heard about the ducks (TITLE DROP!!); three hundred of them got stuck in a tailings pond at another oil sands site [read runner note – two years later, Syncrude was actually found guilty of the death of 1,600 ducks]. The site begins installing anti-waterfowl devices, and the staff are reminded that they have to wear PPE at all times. They’re also told about the death Gerald Snopes, another worker; some of the men talking amongst themselves, and Ryan tells them to have some respect. He had a heart attack while operating a crane, and threw himself out of the cab so that he wouldn’t land on the controls and cause an accident.
Kate hears about a road accident involving some men from Cape Breton. She asks Davy about it to see if she knows them, but neither of them do. Kate finds the news articles and feels annoyed that they were misidentified as Calgary men.
Kate notices some welts on her back; Lindsay has them too but doesn’t know what it is. Kate mentions all the dust they have to wipe off everything, and how there’s so much crap in the air. Lindsay wonders what kind of cancer they’ll have in 20 years.
Kate finds Doug building a scarecrow for the tailings pond, which is meant to scare off the ducks. Probably another arse-covering exercise.
Activists from Greenpeace try to block an oil sands pipeline, and 11 people are arrested. One of the workers gets angry about it, asking who will put their life on the line to unclog the pipe Greenpeace has blocked, and that it sure as hell won’t be the president of Shell. Kate hears about another death – a contractor was in his trucks, and one of the heavy haulers drove over it, crushing him.
Lindsay writes an article for a grassroots paper, giving the inside perspective on working at the oil sands. Kate considers doing a comic about it for them. Lindsay later wonders if she made a mistake writing her article, as many of the comments are critical, including many from women which Lindsay did not expect.
Kate sees a video on YouTube of Celina Harpe, an elder in the Cree community of Fort McKay, talking about the effect of the oil sands on the First Nation. Kate had not realised when she arrived there that Fort McKay was a First Nation, nor that it was so close to Syncrude. She thinks about how she’s not the president of Shell, but she’s still working there, and she can’t extract herself from having come.
At another safety meeting, the staff are down the safety pyramid, which has different levels: at the base it has at-risk behaviours, then near misses, then minor incidents, and it all leads to a major incident or a fatality.
Kate receives a phone call from a reporter at the Globe and Mail who had seen her comics about the oil sands. She asks several leading questions about her experience as a woman at the remote sites and the harassment, but Kate feels uncomfortable giving her examples. She later tells Lindsay that she couldn’t talk to the reporter as she felt like she just wanted gossip, and that the story was already written before she called.
The leering of one of the other workers bothers Kate in the lunchroom, and she tells Lindsay about her assaults. Lindsay is horrified that Mike and Brian laughed at her when she told them about it. Lindsay tells her that it happened to her in university as well.
Kate calls her parents to tell them that she’s finally paid off her student loan, but she needs to keep working at the site because now she has no money. She’s going to try making it as a cartoonist, and her parents are unimpressed.
Kate notices that Ryan is acting strangely, being absent a lot and not doing his work, and it can’t fully be explained by his recent divorce. She hears about other workers who are taking cocaine and behaving strangely too. She asks Ryan if he’s ok and he brushes it off. Kate contemplates the safety pyramid again. She finds a piece of paper on Ryan’s desk with an appointment for the employee assistance program. Emily later tells her that Ryan has left suddenly, and that they need to figure things out until a replacement is found.
Kate wonders why there are so many safety meetings but none have ever talked about drugs or alcohol. Her coworkers say that everyone knows why there is so much of both, and that the company can’t have safety meetings about illegal activities anyway.
Kate finally gets to leave the oil sands and go home. Her colleague Norman gives her prints of some of his photos of the northern lights as a leaving present, including one of a rainbow. Before she leaves, the company organises a staff photograph with all the workers on the site. Kate sees the man who assaulted her the second time, and he recognises her but can’t remember her name or who she is, and asks her how it’s going.
Kate trains her replacement, and finds out that she’s earning more than her despite not having any experience in tools. She complains to John about it, and finally rants about all her shitty treatment in the oil sands. She goes to see Gary in the head office, and demands her full bonus, which was going to be docked because she was leaving. Gary tells her it’s company policy. She tells him about the harassment, and he claims she could have come to them about it, but she fires back that he knows she couldn’t have. Gary agrees to give her the bonus. Her colleagues organise a going-away barbecue, and even Mike attends.
Back in Nova Scotia, Kate is reunited with her family. While out enjoying the seaside air, she chats to a farmer who tells her he’s keeping a field for his son who is working out west in case he ever comes back and wants to build a house. A man called Lauchie visits the house before moving west himself, and tells them there’s something for everyone out there and that the young people have everything they want. Out in Halifax with friends, she and Becky see a man from one of the camps, who tells Becky that they had a bet on who would sleep with her first. Their friends who haven’t worked in the oil sands can’t believe they’d let a man talk to them like that.
In the book’s afterword, Kate talks about how the book chronicles her specific experience at a specific time. She is wary of sensationalism of her story, especially because sexual assault is so common that it’s not actually sensational. She notes that neither of the men who raped her probably consider it to have been rape. She is also critical of the treatment of Indigenous people, and says the YouTube video of Celina Harpe was a “sword that cut through my ignorance”. We also find out that Becky died of cancer, and that her former coworkers pooled money together to send to her.
Bookclub Bingo 2023 categories: Non-Fiction, Graphic Novel (grey), Mod Pick (grey)
Other links:

• The first discussion
• Canada Reads page about Ducks [I hadn’t realised that Station Eleven, another recent bookclub read, was the runner up]
• Kate Beaton on Wikipedia
• Hark! A Vagrant, the archive of Kate Beaton’s comics website
• The original Hark! A Vagrant sketch comic about the oil sands (links to all five parts; I’ve posted the parts individually below this in case that’s easier)
• Original Ducks Part 1
• Original Ducks Part 2
• Original Ducks Part 3
• Original Ducks Part 4
• Original Ducks Part 5
• Lindsay Bird was one of the people in the book whose name wasn’t changed, and in 2019 she published a poetry collection about working in the oil sands called Boom Time. There’s a CBC article about the book here.

The questions are in the comments below. Thank you for joining me and u/fixtheblue in reading this book!

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Hi. So the landlord's agent sent me an N12 by email. Even though the box for "Both the landlord and tenant agree to receive notices and documents by email, where allowed by the Landlord and Tenant Board’s Rules of Procedure" was checked on the lease, the line for "If yes, provide email addresses:" is only the email of the old co-tenant, who assigned it to a new co-tenant. There is no landlord email either.
THE LANDLORD'S AGENT SAYS THE N12 WILL LEAD TO A TERMINATION, AND KEEPS SAYING HE WILL DRAFT THE N11 FOR US THE SIGN (this a huge red flag as they are now playing games into making us volunteerily leave without even giving us 1 months' rent)
We do plan to leave but I need to ensure the N12 is valid, as this landlord had a history of arguing documents they signed are not valid, and promises they made cannot be executed etc.:
In normal cases, I wouldn't be worried if the landlord can wait for us to leave, then argue the N12 is invalid because it was sent to an email address not on the lease (and say we're welcome to stay but we're leaving volunteerily), refuse to give the 1 month's rent (as it would be on the day we've already got our things packed and signed a contract for the new place), then even say we are leaving without giving 60 days notice and rob us for 2 more month's rent.
Am I overthinking or this is actually their plan? If latter, do I requst for another N12? Thanks!

Hi. So the landlord's agent sent me an N12 by email. Even though the box for "Both the landlord and tenant agree to receive notices and documents by email, where allowed by the Landlord and Tenant Board’s Rules of Procedure" was checked on the lease, the line for "If yes, provide email addresses:" is only the email of the old co-tenant, who assigned it to a new co-tenant. There is no landlord email either.
THE LANDLORD'S AGENT SAYS THE N12 WILL LEAD TO A TERMINATION, AND KEEPS SAYING HE WILL DRAFT THE N11 FOR US THE SIGN (this a huge red flag as they are now playing games into making us volunteerily leave without even giving us 1 months' rent)
We do plan to leave but I need to ensure the N12 is valid, as this landlord had a history of arguing documents they signed are not valid, and promises they made cannot be executed etc.:
In normal cases, I wouldn't be worried if the landlord can wait for us to leave, then argue the N12 is invalid because it was sent to an email address not on the lease (and say we're welcome to stay but we're leaving volunteerily), refuse to give the 1 month's rent (as it would be on the day we've already got our things packed and signed a contract for the new place), then even say we are leaving without giving 60 days notice and rob us for 2 more month's rent.
Am I overthinking or this is actually their plan? If latter, do I requst for another N12? Thanks!

Trigger Warning- Racism
My 2 friends and I have been best friends ever since we were kids. Were almost 30 now and they say things that really frustrate me and make me question remaining friends with them. I feel like I’ve grown and diversified myself and they have the same mindset coming from the small white town we grew up in.
For example, when we visit downtown areas they make comments about how we need to lock the doors or try to park somewhere with cameras which just feels like a micro aggression. We went to the park downtown and my friend said "not to make it a race thing but why are there always so many black people here."
My one friend was talking about how she likes everyone at her job (seems like everyone who is white) except the one that argues with people on the phone who is "ghetto" and my friend leaned over and whispered "was she dark" and then they laughed. We passed a girl driving in her car and she had long eyelashes and they laughed at how long they are and my friend said "black bitches always have those long eyelashes."
I could go on. I feel like they stereotype and say something about everyone who is different than them and put them in a box. But their totally fine with other white people who say worse stuff than this.
I don’t like confrontation but this shit hurts my soul. I know its absolutely awful and not ok is it worth trying to educate them or explaining how I feel when they say these things and if nothing changes cut them off? Or do I just do that now?
Besides them saying these things - I know, I’m not trying to rationalize it, I try to see the best in people and I value their friendship and our history, I can’t imagine my life without them, but things just feel different. I can’t believe the ignorance and how I’ve become awake to it and they haven’t at all.
I try to think about how their upbringing has made them this way but mine was similar and I’ve strived to learn and be a better person. I just feel like were not on the same wavelength and my blood boils when these remarks are made. I don’t respond or laugh. And I don’t think they have even noticed.
Please let me know the best way to go about this. I’m deeply sorry if reading this was triggering or hurtful.

TL;DR — Should I Pull?

New Players

Hoooooooo buddy.
Lots to unpack, here.
Firstly, if you do not have UDX Silver, GLEX Silver, Shuzer, or Liam, pull the Romancing Festival reprint for Liam or GLEX Silver. 33k jewels for Liam/Silver with Thyme, Shuzer, Rag Robin, Christmas Empress, and other good styles in the mix is hands down the best deal on offer.
For most new players I'm going to recommend Matriarch's banner. Matriarch and Roc are a very solid support core, and Matriarch gets way better with a couple of inherits that are avaialble in the offbanner pool, which you can select one style from with the ticket you got from logging in today.
If, however, you have Thyme and Overdrive Emelia and you don't have the Matriarch style with Paean of Peace, then I recommend pulling on the Lynn Woods banner for Liz. Liz's Aqua Bash+ can be a functional replacement for Paean of Peace which doesn't require chasing a character who isn't on Rate Up, and the rest of her kit is enabled by Emelia and Thyme is a big way. Polka has similar synergy with them and also brings a damn useful heal to the table, and whilst Jo isn't the same kind of "stupid powerful alongside her enablers" good, she's still a very good style that can deal a lot of damage and avoid nearly as much. Jo is also pretty danged good for a new player to pick up, with a medium Morale Down she can sustain on enemies to help reduce incoming damage by a good chunk. Overall, very solid banner, just not as "ready to go out of box" as the other one.
Depending on what else we see this month, it's possible that going back to the other banner once we see what else is going to be offered may be the best move for newbies. Matriarch + Roc + Thyme + Liz + [ShuzeLiam/Silver] would be a ridiculously good core team for someone with less than 6 months play time. 🤩 But I won't go so far as to say that until we get a better sense of what's on deck. For now, focus on Matriarch if you don't have the big Overdrive enablers; focus on Liz if you do.

Veterans

OK. So on the one hand, we have a banner with a Liz style that solos Remembrance battles. And on the other hand we have a banner with a Matriarch style. Now you may thi- you're already pulling Matriarch. OK, then.
Kidding aside, I know a bunch of people reading this really are about to pull the first banner here simply because it has Matriarch and for no other reason, regardless of whether she's any good or not. And... actually, that's not a bad plan, here. Matriarch is definitely a solid support style, whether you have the Paean of Peace inherit for her or not. Roc is way better if you have certain inherits, but even if you only have her Tower S style, her offbanner A style, and her Platinum pool SS style, she's still a pretty good style with a few good options.
Liz and Polka are also pretty danged good, though. Liz in particular has amazing synergy with Thyme and Overdrive Emelia in content with direct hits to counter. She dispenses WIL buffs to the team and counters with a defense boost for the team on any turn where she can Overdrive... which can actually be most turns if you have Emelia backing her up. Polka can counter with an attack that grants the party an attack boost, so if you bring the both of them, you can actually get a lot of buffs going on overdrive turns against enemies that throw direct AoE attacks.
All of which is a lot of words to say that I can definitely recommend a pull on Matriarch's banner, and if you are eyeing Liz and Polka's banner and have the jewels to spare, I can also recommend some pulls there, but if you need to choose between them, I would definitely recommend Mama's first.

Planes Balloons, Trains, and Automobeels — Romancing Festival Limited Banner

Matriarch

Unit Summary

Indefatigable support unit.

Unit Analysis

Paean of Tranquility is 3 BP for a tiny heal to the party plus a medium defense boost. It's a defense boost, not a Guard Up, so it stacks with any other kind of defense increases you have. It's a single-turn defense boost, but it's 25% on top of a party-wide heal, so it's totally worth spamming if you don't have other, better things for Matriarch to do.
Saga Balloon Sanctuary is a [Fast] B-rank sun AoE for 8 BP. Its damage is not amazing, but it grants a large Attack Boost to the whole party for 3 turns. Since it's an Attack Boost, not a Morale Up, it stacks, so she can actually wind up increasing party damage output by quite a bit with her +2 BP/turn fueling an 8 BP cost skill.
Her third attack is an SSSS attack for 10 BP, which is kind of ridiculous for a character who can spam that every-other-turn. The problem is that Matriarch is such a strong support character that you're arguably not "winning" that exchange by spending her BP on damage instead of support stuff, especially if you also have a high-octane damage dealer like Silver or Liam dwarfing Matriarch's damage.
For a support character she's also tanky... as long as she's able to resist every hit she takes. Every resisted attack she takes 40% less damage from and has a 37% chance to avoid it in the first place. Every non-resisted attack... she takes full damage. So against enemies that only deal one or two types of damage, she's quite resilient. Against enemies that will fling 5+ damage types at you, you might find yourself taking more damage than you expected.

Inherits

Paean of Peace. Just... just Paean of Peace. DEX/WIL/LOV/CHA buff for the whole party. 5 BP a pop. This Mama can spam it forever with no BP support. The WIL keeps your day from being ruined by status effects, the DEX helps Liam's damage, and the LOV/CHA buffs help party healers do their job better. Sure, it occupies all of her time, but it's doing a loooot of work, so it's worth it.
Available from the [Leading the People] style, now in the offbanner pool and available to be collected from the 3rd Anniversary Romancing Festival Exclusive SS Style Exchange with the ticket you received upon login. If you're pulling for this Matriarch style, I strongly recommend you use that ticket to pick up [Leading the People] as well for this inherit.

Rocbouquet

Unit Summary

Reasonable support character who becomes a great support character with inherits.

Unit Analysis

Tons of BP recovery potential. When she hits with an attack that hits a weakness, she gets +1 BP. When she hits with a Shadow attack, she gains +2 BP. So if she hits with a Shadow attack that lands a weakness, get gets 3 BP back.
The attack you're probably be going to do that with is -checks notes- Lightning of Darkness.
That can't be... really, Akatsuki? Really?
Sorry. So, yeah, Lightning of Darkness is 8 BP for S-rank Shadow/Lightning damage. That's expensive for an S-rank attack (although it's at the high end of S-rank, so you can think of it as a weak SS attack), but it hits two weaknesses, it debuffs all of the enemy's stats, and it inflicts an Attack Down on the enemy. So it's expensive because it's trying to cram a lot of stuff into one attack. The debuff is not going to be terribly useful because so many bosses will Defy Weakness at the first hint of stat debuffs, but on the rare occasion where that's not the case it can definitely be useful to debuff a bunch of stats at once. The attack down is small and only for 1 turn, so it's not amazing, but it's also noteworthy that it's not a Morale Down, so it will stack with Morale Down users.
Goby Spark is another overcosted attack, this time an AoE. Spark will clear all INT buffs on the targets in addition to debuffing their INT. That's actually a pretty big deal because it means she is really good at shutting down enemies that like to buff their INT, and enemies that love to buff their INT are some of the most problematic bosses. There's an inherit that's going to be better for this purpose in a lot of boss battles, but we're not quite to inherits, yet.
Like Matriarch, she's tanky against attacks that she resists. (She actually has the same ability - reduce resisted attacks and high chance to evade them.) Unlike Matriarch, she can stack more tankiness on top of that if you're flinging Lightning damage at the enemy, topping out at 40% mitigation if you hit with a lightning attack every single turn, healing herself with each of those as well. Oh, and if she's hitting a weakness, she'll tack a second tiny self-heal on as well. So if you're spamming Lightning of Darkness (-sigh-) and hitting a weakness with every attack, not only do you get the Attack Down effect and maybe some stat debuffs, but you're also ramping up to 64% mitigation (and 50% damage boosts) and double self-healing herself every turn.
And if you can spare the bonus BP, the bonus damage, and the bonus mitigation, she also has one of the most unique heals in the game. It's a 0 BP spell so it's BP positive on the turns she uses it despite forfeiting both of her BP ability procs that turn, but what's notable about it is that it grants the target a small Defense Up. Small Defense Up is only 5%, but it sticks for the rest of the battle, meaning Roc can dump her LP into Liam while he's dumping his LP to give him an extra 20% damage mitigation. And then she'll proceed to spam an Attack Down/stat debuff attack. Not bad, Roc. Not bad.

Inherits

-deep breath- OK, cannons. You can do this.
This is Rocbouquet's 9th style. Most of those styles have at least one relevant inherit. Many of them have multiple spells worth looking at.
So let's start with GLEX Roc, currently in the offbanner pool. Psycho Boom is a shadow attack that debuffs the enemy's INT and WIL which chases with Euthanize, which is another shadow attack that debuffs INT. It's a lot of INT debuffing in a single turn, and if it happens to hit a weakness, it refunds 6 of its 12 BP cost. The majority of bosses in modern content will definitely Defy Weakness the next turn, but if you happen to find a boss that doesn't Defy, it ruins INT-based attacks.
After that we have Blooming Fireworks, which amplifies into an A-rank shadow/heat AoE for 10 BP which refunds BP to the party. It's random whether it refunds 1 BP or 2, so it's technically an unreliable BP battery, but since it always grants at least 1, it's still functionally a pretty good BP support spell. Roc gaining +2 BP guaranteed when she casts it (shadow damage) and maybe getting another +1 if it hits a weakness makes her one of the best BP battery units in the game.
Finally from GLEX Roc (yes, all three of the spells on that style are worth considering for inherits) you have Lightning Crash. Lightning Crash isn't really anything special — it's just a 0 BP Shadow/Lightning spell that can stun its target. But it's worth inheriting because it lets Roc sustain her Lightning attack buffs while she's spamming her main S2 attack down/debuff attack.
Jumping around to other styles we have Marine Ball from her previous limited style, which is a 5 BP AoE Morale Down attack. It's pure cold damage so it doesn't trigger either of her damage type bonuses, but it's a 3-turn Morale Down that she can potentially stack with her S2's Attack Down if you need more damage debuffing from her.
Dark Pulse from her previous Prefecture style is a 3 BP shadow/lightning AoE attack. Its damage is not considered good for that BP cost anymore, but she can spam it forever and be BP positive like with Lightning Crash but hitting an AoE instead of just a single target, in the event that you need that.
Enraged Squid from that style also happens to be the highest potential damage spell she has. It's 12 BP and it hits randomly between 3 and 5 times, so it's not a reliable nuke, but if you want to use her for damage, that's the spell to go with.
Soul Freeze from her A style (in the offbanner pool; you almost certainly have it if you've pulled on more than 3 limited banners in the last 6 months) amplifies into an A-rank shadow AoE for 9 BP, which is a pretty good cost for the damage it deals. On farms, she can use this on both turns 1 and 2 as long as she hits a weakness with it on turn 1, which winds up being a really good amount of AoE over two turns. It also has a chance to paralyze, although if you want paralyze and you don't need the AoE, Shadow Chains from that style would be better, with both a much cheaper cost (2 BP) and a higher innate chance to paralyze.
Also from A Roc (yeah, another style where all three spells matter) you have Drain Life. Drain Life amplifies into a 4 BP B-rank shadow attack that comes attached with a Small self-heal. The self-heal sizing in this game is not helpfully categorized, and Small self-heal tends to equate to about 900-1200 heals, depending on formation and buffs, making it a spammable attack that is very good at keeping her HP topped up.
Moving on to her SaGa the Stage style, we have Tri-Flower, a C-rank shadow AoE for 6 BP. Tri Flower's damage is utterly unimpressive, but it also buffs the party's WIL, and this style can cast it a whooooole lot with its +2 BP on shadow hit, which is a very compelling option to have for a unit that can dispense Defense Ups.
Her Platinum SS style has Water of Life, which is not going to compare favorably to Graceful Cup in most situations, but it can remove stat debuffs, and in some situations that may be more important than the Defense Up.
Also from the Platinum style is Energy Storm. Energy Storm amps into an 8 BP B-rank shadow AoE. Soul Freeze+ is better damage for only slightly more BP, so on 2-round AoE farms, you would want to use Soul Freeze. On 3-round farms, however, Roc can use Energy Storm on all three rounds as long as she hits a weakness on turn 1 and turn 2. B-rank damage is not always going to clear a round on its own, but being able to cast it back-to-back-to-back is still damn handy.
OK! Final style! We're almost there, cannons!
Last but not least is her S style from the very first Tower event the game released. Lightning from that style amplifies into a 0 BP lightning attack, similar to Lightning Crash from GLEX Roc. Triggering just the lightning portion of her Goby Hook Switch ability is obviously worse than trigger both portions, but it's better than triggering none of them which is what her staff bonk would do. If you don't have Lightning Crash, consider Lightning+ as a filler spell for those turns where she needs to recharge BP - it sustains the DEF boost and it gives her a little more bonus heals.
But Lightning+ isn't the spell we really care about, here. The spell we really care about here is Dark Wash. Dark Wash amplifies into a 10 BP SSS-rank shadow attack, which is already a compelling option over the abysmally-named Lightning of Darkness. But above-and-beyond that, Dark Wash+ removes all stat buffs on its target — not just their INT buffs like Goby Spark does. Getting that buff break function out of a cheaper spell and for all stats is a pretty big deal, and since this is from a tower style, every player has access to it. She has a highly awkward BP rotation using it, so it's not accurate to say she can use it every-other-turn or every-three-turns, but she can use it frequently enough that she can keep even bosses that have pretty aggressive stat buffing in check fairly well.

Macha

Unit Summary

Overdrive damage enabler made far better with an inherit from her last style.

Unit Analysis

Macha with no inherits is kinda meh, honestly. She can theoretically get a lot of BP going between her innate +1 BP/turn and her S1's 25% chance to grant her +4 BP on cast. And she has a ~40% chance to chase every attack with Crimson Flare+, which is a pretty hefty chase attack backed up by her 65% damage boosts. But where she falls down is what she can spend that BP on.
Flame Bash and Saga Magical Train are both AoE attacks. Neither one is especially impressive damage-wise, but they both have decent rider effects. Flame Bash will buff Macha's INT (before attacking, so she gets the buff before damage is dealt) and Magical Train inflicts Sundered on the the targets for 2 turns. Sundered makes the enemy take more damage with each attack they take that turn, meaning if you have Liam and Silver on-deck, they wind up taking a ton of damage just from the chase attacks.
Macha benefits strongly from getting more Overdrive turns, both because inflicting Sundered first thing in the turn helps maximize the damage you get out of it and also because she chases Overdrive attacks with Crimson Sunflare, getting a free trigger on the Sundered effect.
Unfortunately, Macha's only innate defenses and a good chunk of her damage modifiers come from an automatic Morale Up and Guard Up she gets every turn, which do not stack with other Morale Up or Guard Ups. That gives her poor synergy with styles like Music Fest Goddess who grant the party Guard Ups, or Riki who grants the party Morale Ups, or Summer Fatima who does both. And since Macha is only helping to deal more damage, that failure to stack with other Morale Ups/Guard Ups does actually hinder her compared to other characters like Urpina who have innate defenses that do stack with Guard Ups and can dish out a decent amount of damage on their own whilst also helping to squeeze more damage out of their teammates.

Inherits

Divine Tree from her Lunar New Year style helps solve the issue above where the only thing Macha does is damage. Divine Tree is two hits of C-rank blunt/pierce damage which recovers the party's HP on each hit. Divine Tree is actually a decent attack in its own right, and with Macha's +BP tools you can use it frequently enough that it becomes the most heals-per-turn any character can muster without specific kinds of cooperation from the enemy. Of course, you don't wind up using it every turn, which can sometimes be a drawback (you may need the heal on a turn when her BP isn't ready), but on average it winds up being a very, very good healing tool.

Beef... it's what's defeating the enemies — Romancing Festival Limited Banner

Polka Lynn Wood

Unit Summary

Polka is a tank who can get in some counter hits, heal up his teammates, and dispense big hits that come attached to big attack boosts for the party.

Unit Analysis

First is Hearty Steak. Polka sizzles up a decent heal for a teammate and the charbroiled flavor continues to grant them an end-of-turn tiny heal for the next 5 turns. Whenever Polka uses it, he also grants himself that same 5 turns of end-of-turn heal. So it winds up being a good amount of healing for the LP, actually.
Second is Rising Kuroge Wagyu. Polka throws a whole-ass cow at the enemy for SSS-rank heat damage and the... smell...? grants the party a very large attack boost for the rest of the turn. Thankfully, it has [Fast] priority, so it's going to be rare for the attack boost to go to waste. Polka's damage is decent enough on his own, I suppose, but the attack boost for the party is still going to be the meat of the skill, here.
Third is his ability Skills of a Chef. Skills of a Chef is a solid damage mitigation ability plus Flame Ward (polka takes no heat damage and counters all direct attacks with a little heat attack) plus Overdrive chaser. What's the Overdrive chaser? It's Rising Kuroge Wagyu!
-presses hand to ear- I'm sorry, I've been informed that it's not an Overdrive chaser, it's an Overdrive counter. So on Overdrive turns, every time Polka gets hit, he drops a big heat attack on the enemy and he boosts the party's damage some more. If you have characters using big Delay attacks or you just expect Polka to get hit a lot that turn, that attack boost adds up for serious damage.
The longer the fight goes on the tougher Polka gets, so after 5 turns he's pretty tanky (nearly 60% mitigation) and has both reliable self-heal-on-hit and on-demand heal/turn. So he can take those direct attacks like a champ.

Inherits

Still Blade Phoenix is the big one, giving Polka a 9 BP SSS slash/heat delay attack that drops a decent-sized heal on the party. This Polka is slightly tankier than Robin Polka (the style that has that skill), has better BP rotation, and has slightly better self-heal potential, but winds up dealing less damage if the enemy is dishing out lots of direct attacks. (No stacking buff-on-hit and a weaker counterattack.) Your call, there.
If party-wide heals aren't your concern, there's also Back Detonation, an 8 BP SS heat attack that has a medium(!) self-heal. Medium self-heal is substantial enough that it can actually overheal with enough CHA buffs in play. And at the lower BP cost than Still Blade, Polka can use it more often, just straight face-tanking for the team.

Liz Lynn Wood

Unit Summary

Combination WIL buffer and counter defense booster. It's... yeah, it's weird, just read further.

Unit Analysis

OK, so Liz parallels Polka significantly. Where Polka has decent damage and slowly stacks up defense, Liz starts with solid defenses and slowly stacks up damage. Where Polka counters with an attack boost on overdrive turns, Liz counters with a defense boost. Where Polka has heals for the party and self-heals, Liz has WIL buffs for the party and self-heals. Where Polka ignores heat damage, Liz ignores cold damage.
The main difference between the two is that Polka is going to want to save his BP for the big attack + attack boost, where Liz is more likely to want to spam Aqua Bash+, the WIL buff. Aqua Bash is actually a decent attack (B-rank column cold damage for 4 BP) and has the highest Overdrive gain of any skill in the game (restores 25% of the gauge on hit), making her very good at cycling her Overdrive meter back to full. When she overdrive counters with Karatsu Water Wall, she grants a huge defense boost to the party, meaning in situations where you can focus a lot of direct attacks onto Liz, she can wind up absolutely flooring the damage the party takes on her Overdrive turns. And with support from Emelia and Thyme, you can make sure those overdrive turns happen pretty dang frequently.
Honestly, the spammable WIL buff on its own is a pretty sweet deal, but in battles where direct attacks are flying every which way? Yeah, Liz will put in work.

Inherits

Droplet from her last all-mage style is a spot heal that grants the target Guard Up. Great for helping someone survive a turn when Liz doesn't have Overdrive built up yet.
Twin Arrows from her A style (story reward from Polka's story) amplifies into an attack that grants her two tiny self-heals on hit for 3 BP. Great for helping top Liz's health back up between Overdrive turns.

Jo

Unit Summary

Supportish unit who gets to be super tanky for 10 total turns per battle.

Unit Analysis

When Jo's Overdrive gauge isn't full, she has 55% damage mitigation and 20% damage modifiers. When it is full, she has 30% damage mitigation and 45% damage modifiers.
On her overdrive turns, you will want to use Glacial Ray, a 10 BP SSS cold/sun attack with delay. Glacial Ray can only be used 5 times per battle (it's an arbitrary limit; think of it as costing 1 LP but you get to keep the LP for KO purposes), but it causes Jo to ignore all damage for 2 turns. With 55% damage mitigation on turns outside of that window, I don't think I need to explain how good that makes Jo at not getting KO'd.
OK, so she's tough to KO. That's great. What else she do? Well..... not a ton, actually. Glacial Ray is by far her best attack, the other two being E-rank damage and a B-Rank AoE. Fresh Squid (the E-rank attack) includes a self-heal, which is great, but again, it's not bringing much damage to the table. And Ice & Fire Giant Squid, the AoE, is fine damage-wise, and it even includes a Medium Morale Down for 2 turns to help keep damage input low for the rest of the team, but it's 8 BP, so you won't be spamming it.
Now, in fairness, Jo does get +2 BP/turn, so it's not at all difficult to rotate Hot/Cold Squid or to be ready with 10 BP for Glacial Ray on overdrive turns. But if you don't need the AoE component of the Morale Down, she also offers less damage than Aisha does with Earth Thrust, which also maintains a Morale Down.
Now "extremely sturdy + maintains Morale Down" is still a very good deal, don't get me wrong. There's definitely going to be battles where Jo is going to be better to bring than Aisha. But it's also not breaking new ground.

Inherits

Lots, but I'm going to focus on two.
Sunshower from her S style (a GLEX style that was awarded during an event I no longer recall; probably going to be avaialble as a drop at some point this month) is a 4 BP cold/sun AoE attack that grants the party a tiny heal. This is actually BP-positive on this style, since she gets +2 BP/turn automatically, allowing Jo to spam that heal until it's time to drop Glacial Ray. Or if you need the Morale Down more, you can have Sunshower in your back pocket to spend a little excess BP on to help keep the party topped up while you're rotating Hot/Cold Squid.
The other is Sparkling Ice from Robingal. Sparkling Ice deals SSS cold/sun damage, chases with SSS heat/sun damage, and then paralyzes Jo for 3 turns. This is not the highest-damage Jo to utilize this spell, but she is the only Jo style that can use it every-other-turn should you have someone who can cleanse the paralyze.

I have gigabyte internet and two hard wired computers right to the modem. On one machine I get 980 mbps. On the other I get 93. I have connected with another cable over the floor direct and my computer gets 980 like the other. It has to be one of the female jacks in the wall as I have tried different cables including the one to my wifes which gets the 980. No difference. Is there one particular wire from the twisted pairs that would give me the slowdown or could it be any particular one? Could it be one wire not connected?
Any and all help/suggestions appreciated.

Hopefully one of these is a decent clip.
Longer-ish clips? November 13, 2022. https://www.youtube.com/live/YmQ4NhtCxBs?feature=share
1:03:40 1:32:59 - Sofia in clip 2:17:20 3:01:24 - Eventually has a weird laugh —-
December 13, 2022 https://www.youtube.com/live/PSdLVIv0ZqA?feature=share
21:01 - Freaks out over Chickens clip x2. Doesn’t understand “pre-recorded” clip.
33:07 - John freaks out over middle finger guy after thinking it’s a pre-recorded. Asks why he does it. —-
December 8, 2022 https://www.youtube.com/live/mv2pxWHe5IQ?feature=share
24:23 - Masha sticks her face in Chicken’s face while doing a skit.
26:51 - Chickens dies inside. - “I used to follow you.” - Plus Sofia’s “Not anymore” comment.
51:59 - Jumpscare win
2:01:41 - Chickens freaks out over dude who breaks wall of boxes. - Can’t figure out if real or not.
2:36:12 - “I Saw You on Tik Tok” skit. —-
December 7, 2022 https://www.youtube.com/live/i_alxYLsQJo?feature=share
1:22:30 - MASHA STREAM
2:35:50 - “I Like Your Hair”
2:49:00 - 2:50:06 - “I Used to Watch You” + John’s commentary about it after the next person he skips. —-
December 10, 2022 - https://www.youtube.com/live/1dlxTdIup8Y?feature=share
1:18:08 - Live-Action John attacks Chickens.
1:30:10 - John’s face - Jumpscare Win. + John gets angry because he hits the wrong button and skips.
1:37:10 - Jumpscare win to Chicken’s fans.
1:49:28 - Live-Action John attacks Chickens. Both enjoy the video result. John appears again 1:50:34.
1:56:00 - Jumpscare win.
2:06:32 - Perfectly timed lag win - Chickens
2:30:46 - Skit success. Jumpscare win.
2:54:32 - Jumpscare win. 2:54:50 - John’s face scare win.
2:56:48 - John’s face scare win. 2:56:55 - Prank success. 2:57:30 - Jumpscare win.
3:19:27 - “Someone’s Hacking Us” —-
December 12 2022 - https://www.youtube.com/live/-HjD-Xf1bH4?feature=share
41:52 - John liked the reaction
—-
November 17, 2022 - https://www.youtube.com/live/pYmq_64FJTM?feature=share
41:28 - Jumpscare win.
—-
January 20, 2023 - https://www.youtube.com/live/P9cOVZ0KBko?feature=share
1:24:34 - Jumpscare win. —-
October 29, 2022 - https://www.youtube.com/live/n3uwJFloAVg?feature=share
1:09:45 - John scares people.