Sugar me smooth amazon
Full Flavor Unfrosted Makeup Discussions
2014.10.13 21:11 Hereibe Full Flavor Unfrosted Makeup Discussions
/sugarfreemua is for people who want actual "sugar-free" advice/constructive criticism on makeup application.
2013.01.25 04:46 cottonheadedninnymug Emotional Abuse Subreddit
A subreddit for people who are or were affected by emotional abuse. Share your stories and we can help each other overcome our pains, sometimes by the use of internet hugs.
2019.05.22 03:53 dreetea Boramiyu (보라미유)
Boramiyu (보라미유) is a South Korean solo singer who debuted under Shofar Entertainment (쇼파르엔터테인먼트) (formerly Shofar Music (쇼파르뮤직)) on November 21, 2018. She is known for her various covers on YouTube, performing on I Can See Your Voice / ICSYV (너의 목소리가 보여) 5 (as Jang Boram (장보람)), and releasing several singles, mini albums, and OST's for K-dramas such as: Once Upon a Small Town (어쩌다 전원일기), Now, We Are Breaking Up (지금, 헤어지는 중입니다), Do Do Sol Sol La La Sol (도도솔솔라라솔), Into the Ring (출사표), 제3의 매력.
2023.06.09 07:00 DolorasaurasRex Miscarried and diagnosed with pcos all in the same day. Today I think I saw the fetus. Loving life right now.
My husband (34) and I(28) cannot wait to be parents. We tried to do things right. Save up. Get good jobs. Make sure we were both ready. I changed my eating habits. Cut out a lot of processed foods. Cut back on sugar. Avoided alcohol almost completely for the last 6 months.
We got a positive pregnancy test 2 weeks ago.
5 days ago we rushed to the ER. I was having the worst cramps I had ever felt and sudden severe bleeding.
Hours later was told I lost the baby due to being rh - and in addition to that terrible news I learned that I have pcos.
I feel like I've been living my life from the outside looking in.
Friday the cramps started.
Saturday the spotting started. The cramps got worse.
Sunday was the worst day of my life bare none. The cramps pain was unbearable. The bleeding was mind blowing. I was going through 4 super plus tampons in an hour. The pads were the only thing keeping me from bleeding through my clothes every 15 mins. The ER was no help.
Today I found a clump of cells in between the clots in my pad. I don't know why I looked. I usually just throw it away. But I looked. And it was there. In my gut I knew what it was.
It was slightly bigger than an apple seed. It looked so much like a tiny baby. I could see the veins. I saw what looked like a small dark red clump near the center. A thin cord like strand attached to the bean shaped clump.
I sat in the bathroom at work and cried for half an hour. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to flush it. I knew I was being crazy. I couldn't keep it. So I just moved it to a piece of toilet paper and stared at it for too long. I took a picture. I don't know why I did that. I don't know what was going through my mind. Then I flushed it. I felt sick to my stomach. I felt numb to the world.
I feel crazy. I go from normal, to depressed, to distraught, to laughing, to numb and back around in what feels like minutes. It's 1 am and I can't sleep.
This feels unreal. The doctors have been zero help. I don't know who to talk to. My husband doesn't know I saw it, but he's taken the loss so hard I can't burden him anymore.
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DolorasaurasRex to
Miscarriage [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 07:00 GlitteringSeaweed460 Trainwreck cart Leafology (someone asked me to post a pic of the actual cart from previous post instead of just the bag) Took these after using it a couple times before they asked. Taste great and smooth
2023.06.09 06:59 abyss_des-etoiles WIBTAH If I tore my family apart?
Potential TW for nongraphic mentions of eating disorders and molestation.
I (F 16) recently told my mother that my brother (M 24) molested my sister (F 19) and me on multiple occasions several years ago. Sister and I had a whole discussion about what this entailed, and our mother didn't seem to be taking us seriously. She said he was "a bit mentally delayed as a child" (he has a minor physical disability which he exploits with our mother's help anytime he does anything wrong) and was probably just playing. The thing is, he manipulated sister and me in ways specific to our personalities to ensure neither of us would say anything. He would also make sure our parents weren't home (he was often tasked with babysitting) and would lock the doors to prevent surprises. He was 15 YO the last time it happened, which I feel is more than old enough to understand.
In this conversation, our mother also revealed that she believes this to be a very minor thing that all brothers do to their sisters, as her brothers molested her as a child (she didn't specify what happened, so I have no idea how far this went, but I do know that she grew up in a very rural area in the 70's, and as such often went out shirtless). She told sister and me to stop talking about it and forget about it, as it meant nothing, and that she was certain our brother didn't mean to cause us harm. She also said that if it was really a problem, we should have said something back then (I had no idea what rape was at the time, nor did I know anything about "private parts," as my incredibly conservative parents kept me sheltered under a rock).
Here's the thing: our brother hasn't changed at all. He hasn't molested us in several years, yes, but he is still very handsy and doesn't really treat sister or me like his siblings. He's extremely sexist and generally unpleasant, very far right, and currently failing in life (apologies if this sounds mean. I'll admit, I don't like him at all, and I don't know of a nicer way to describe his situation. He dropped out of college without a degree and is about to move back home).
To add one more large family rift before I get to the point, our mother has caused all of her daughters an eating disorder at some point. Growing up, our mother was often called fat, and told she could be cute if she lost a few pounds. She is not obese, but she is not skinny (she looks about like a normal 50 YO woman imo…). Throughout my childhood, she would encourage me to eat gum instead of snacking, to go on a sugar-free diet, and forced me to get up early in the morning to run with her. As anyone could expect, I pretty quickly learned to stop eating. Reached my lowest and sickest a few months ago and have been in silent recovery since (ended up with a stomach ulcer, blamed all symptoms and weight loss on that. Doing well now, thanks for asking). My other sister (F 22) has also recently returned from college. She used to be the skinny one that our mother would compare me to, so it was almost a relief (I know, I'm TA for this) when she went through a depressive episode and gained a lot of weight. She is now very insecure and our mother is guiding her down the path to an eating disorder. She's been eating very small amounts about since the time I started recovering, and is constantly judging me, telling me I need to lose weight (like I said, I blamed all my symptoms on the stomach ulcer, and completely denied that I had an ED, so none of my family knows I had one). I'm worried I'm going to relapse if I stay around her. Heck, even when I was at my lowest (underweight and literally dying) she told me she was skinnier when she was my age.
Now, to the point. Our father is a very old-school religious man, raised in a very Christian conservative 60's home. He has seen our mother struggle with her body image over the years, and so maintains a very stern position of "everyones' bodies are different, and we all need to eat to take care of ourselves." He also believes in strict Biblical punishments for rape/paedophilia. He used to be very harsh towards us, but has begun to realise that we're very quickly growing up and moving away (I'm going to uni with sister (19) this autumn) and has become more tender (he's probably having a midlife crisis tbh). He's really grown fond of sister (19) and me the past few years (sister (22) and brother moved across the country for college and are now back… without degrees…) and I believe he now favours us over our other siblings, as we now carry the family's potential (lol).
Sister (19) and I never told him about the molestation because… that's just not really something you tell your father…
But now I'm wondering if we should- and while we're at it, if we should mention the ongoing struggles with eating (because every time I tell my mother sister (22) is developing an eating disorder, she shrugs it off, and says sister (22) needs to lose some weight).
Doing this would tear our family apart, I have no doubt. The eldest two are our mother's favourites (she wanted 3 sons, so brother is her top favourite, and sister (22) is currently her little project) but us youngest two are our father's favourites. My parents have never had a major fight, so would it be wrong of me to ruin this balance?
I feel like our family is already falling apart. Our father is getting older and hasn't seen a doctor in several decades (he doesn't trust them), so it's a bit of a "speak now or forever hold your peace" sort of deal. There's a chance he could blow us off, too, but there's also the chance that he could take initiative and go for the root of the problem.
This might not fix anything, and might make everything worse. Maybe our mother was right, and we should have said something years ago. Maybe this all could've been over by now.
TLDR; My average suburban white family has some problems, but not according to our mum. Shall I tattle to Pa? :,(
WIBTAH if I tore my family apart?
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abyss_des-etoiles to
AITAH [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:59 Clappie_Chan 34 days clean from fent, YOU CAN DO IT.
May 5th was the last time I used, my preferred drug was the blues and I started off taking them orally then a girl I started talking to introduced me to smoking the pills on aluminum foil.
Little did I know that smoking a short acting opioid would mean I would constantly need to re-dose. My habit got bad, I went from taking half a pill or a full pill orally to smoking 4-6 pills a day.
I got fed up of constantly worrying about my next dose, so I put in a bunch of paid time off for work since I knew I would be withdrawing. The first 3 days were absolutely hell. I had 7 sublingual 8mg suboxone strips I planned on transitioning to. (got them illegally) The transition was relatively smooth and i stated feeling stabilized around the 2.5-3 week mark. I am now officially prescribed suboxone and take 4 mgs a day.
Starting to lead a normal life now, it seems my sleep hygiene is getting much better now. I have made a habit in working out everyday, strength training and cardio. It’s crazy how the human body heals. My skin always looked like shit while I was actively using.
I’m starting to get a glow back in my skin and my eye bags are completely gone. Suboxone helped get me away from the streets and that life so I am an advocate for medication assisted treatment. I’m planning on tapering off the subs when the time is right.
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Clappie_Chan to
OpiatesRecovery [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:56 jadexolive a message to the girl that thinks she’s entitled to my time & personal space
i had one request, don’t come to my house anymore. i finally had enough of you coming over, not speaking to anyone, asking to use our things, and then forcing your partner to leave after 20-30 minutes, on top of the previous years of constant lies and manipulation. and you reply with a long, sugar coated “i’m not going anywhere, bitch, and y’all are going to be involved in our future kids lives so we’re gonna see a lot of each other”. you cannot force yourself on me. you can act as sweet & innocent as you want but everyone besides your partner sees right through you. people are disposable to you, you use them, get what you want, and then throw them away. and you’re not as sneaky as you’d like to think. you can hide what happened between us, but when your partner starts to wonder why we tell him “no” every time he mentions bringing you over, you’ll have to start speaking up.
y’all may be married, but that does not mean that our partners can’t continue their friendship without us there. i don’t need to constantly be there, and neither do you, but considering our house is the place they like to congregate, i get to be there and i also get to say that you don’t. & that’s also not me saying that my partner can’t visit y’all. however, i’m not the only one that doesn’t want you around.
you only come to make sure he leaves when you want him to, which is usually less than 25 minutes, and y’all only make people uncomfortable by constantly babying each other. my partner just wants his friend & brother back, but you never let him be himself because you’re attached to him at the hip. you drove a wedge between their relationship, and when the day finally comes that it crumbles because of your inability to not be the center of attention, they both will have so much resentment for you, & i promise, it’s a much closer day than you think.
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jadexolive to
TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:53 TauCetiE09 Looking for first pc, have a limit of 400 dollars.
Hi! I was looking to get a pc, (I play on a PlayStation 4) and I was wondering if this would be a valid choice. I have no pc building experience, so please keep that in mind, I already have headphones and a monitor, I just need an actual computer. I have a limit of 400 dollars, and this 360 pc looks like the best option with me having leftover money to get games. Please let me know.
Here is the pc i was talking about:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0BRL5PF1L/ref=ox_sc_act_title_1?smid=A27Q4NXVM8ES3L&psc=1 submitted by
TauCetiE09 to
pcmasterrace [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:52 TauCetiE09 First pc, 400 dollars limit.
Hi! I was looking to get a pc, (I play on a PlayStation 4) and I was wondering if this would be a valid choice. I have no pc building experience, so please keep that in mind, I already have headphones and a monitor, I just need an actual computer. I have a limit of 400 dollars, and this 360 pc looks like the best option with me having leftover money to get games. Please let me know. Here is the pc i was talking about:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0BRL5PF1L/ref=ox\_sc\_act\_title\_1?smid=A27Q4NXVM8ES3L&psc=1 submitted by
TauCetiE09 to
PcMasterRaceBuilds [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:52 florgblorgle First rep: the good, the bad, the ugly
Just sharing my experiences buying a pretty-well-known rep from a pretty-well-known TD. I don’t want to call out the TD or make this about a specific factory or model; it’s really more about my general experience of buying a rep.
The good:
- The watch is absolutely beautiful. Really, it looks fantastic. I was concerned about color (so hard to get right) and they nailed it.
- Accuracy, so far, is better than acceptable. Maybe +1s/day when I was checking against my iPhone.
- I have a gen from the brand and I honestly couldn’t point to anything visually or on the wrist that sets the gen above the rep. They look identical in quality and they have the same feel on the wrist.
- the price and value for what you get is really hard to beat. Something like 5% of what it would cost at an AD for a watch that looks exactly like the real thing.
But it doesn’t feel like the real thing in some ways, and buying it was not a great experience.
The meh:
- The bracelet was really hard to adjust and the tolerances seemed off. Screws were hard to release, pins difficult to engage, clasp and links were sticky.
- The stem definitely feels brittle, and with the reputation for being fragile I feel like I need to baby it and hope for the best.
- The whole purchasing process took way too long, I didn’t get the exact color scheme I wanted, and the whole international payments setup is janky.
- Way too much plastic, wrapping material, styrofoam, and disposable packaging.
- QC: it looked fine, but who knows? TBD how long it will run without issues.
And the ugly: The clasp for the rubber strap broke immediately. And by immediately I mean it broke the moment I tried to thread the watch band through the clasp; the pin was poorly attached and broke on contact. And the reaction from the TD was “oh, that’s broken” and no immediate offer of a replacement. $15 on Amazon to get a generic replacement if the TD ghosts me but still, the clasp manufacturing was clearly shoddy.
Will I buy another rep? Maaaaaaybe. Honestly, something Chinese in the same price tier like a San Martin (I have two) feels like it has better QC and wasn’t as much of a PITA to buy. But for how beautiful the watch looks and for the price and for the personal amusement value of a high-end rep, not too bad. I don’t know that having a local AD is worth paying 20x more, but I do know that buying my gen was a much more pleasant experience, they took care of all the fitting and adjustments, could be trusted for service and repair, and just in general didn’t feel like buying stuff from a shady dude behind a convenience store. That said, it’s a beautiful watch for a fraction of the price of the real thing.
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florgblorgle to
RepTime [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:47 SpankySharp1 Suggestions to make it easier?
I'm a 38-year-old male and have bitten my nails my entire life. I've gotten very self-conscious about it over the past year, and as a New Year's Resolution I told myself I was going to stop.
And it hasn't gone horribly! I used the bad-tasting Mavala Stop I bought on Amazon to get started, but after that it has just been willpower pushing me. The problem is, I still keep my fingers near my mouth and often begin to chew a fingernail but don't bite it all the way off. I'm also extremely aware of my nails all the time. It's like my hands, with nails, aren't my own hands—and I don't mean that in a good way. So I'll clip them very short, to the length they were when I was biting them.
How long should it take to adjust? I ask this because I was very addicted to nicotine, but I used a combination of Nicorette lozenges and the patch, and I've been nicotine-free now for 7 years. But even during that process of quitting tobacco, after a few weeks I was no longer craving cigarettes; but I've been not biting my nails for five months and I'm still having those "cravings."
Finally: I was in the car today for a few hours and eventually relapsed and bit my nails down on all 10 fingers to the point that they've been throbbing for hours, which is why I'm here to try to seek out a solution I haven't thought of.
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SpankySharp1 to
nailbiting [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:47 bluequail About the API changes, and I want feedback from you guys.
Edit - this is levywife's post about it:
https://www.reddit.com/needadvice/comments/144ef9w/needadvice_will_be_participating_in_the_blackout/ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am going to just do this as a new post, so levywife isn't slammed with responses.
I've just unlocked this post, I want to hear feedback from people.
This is just my take on it all... the people who make 3rd party apps don't do it for free. There are some 3rd party apps that are free, they won't be charged anything, from what I am reading, if I understand it correctly.
I would ask that the people that do want to participate in this walk-out not harrass the mods or subs that choose not participate. Mods volunteer their own time for free, and are not a part of the decision to start charging for the API access.
There is a pretty fair chance that RES will be disappearing, too. Here is an announcement from them:
https://www.reddit.com/RESAnnouncements/comments/141hyv3/announcement_res_reddits_upcoming_api_changes/ Apollo and RIF have both already announced that their 3rd party apps will be closing permanently on June 30th.
https://www.reddit.com/Save3rdPartyApps/comments/144fmbw/apollo_will_close_down_on_june_30th/ https://www.reddit.com/Save3rdPartyApps/comments/144h47v/rif_permanently_shutting_down_june_30th/ In the meantime, on the "save3rdpartyapps subreddit, I am seeing a lot of low class, trashy, nd juvenile asshattery that I personally don't want to be associated with. The whole thing has the air of a witch hunt to me, and I don't play that game. But I have gotten years of enjoyment and help from RES, and Imgur, and in support them them alone (this is strictly my viewpoint), am willing to shut this down for the two days for them.
But the other top mod (the one that keeps the axles greased so everything can run smoothly) uses the mobile apps, and needs it to be able to mod in here. If we lose her (and the app she uses), I will probably have to go back to shutting down the sub, every time I go to sleep.
The admin
spez is doing an AMA tomorrow, and it is a good time to ask questions if you have any.
https://www.reddit.com/Save3rdPartyApps/comments/144i2l9/locked_and_0_points_this_is_going_well_for_sure/ But I have always asked for utmost integrity from the users of this sub, and I would ask that you approach this whole thing in that manner, too.
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bluequail to
needadvice [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:45 GrennTerius Best type of exercises (diet?) for a thin and feminine body?
Hi, AMAB here, I'm working towards using long dresses and skirts in the future (I don't feel comfortable using revealing clothes for now, either masc or femme). I'm fat but fairly tall, which helps concealing some of my obesity, but I think will not look good on those clothes as long as I mantain this kind of weight. Some plus sized people look really good in that setup, but I think that isn't my case, maybe it's psychological or """genetic""", I don't know, I'm fairly confused tbh.
(Before continuing the read, keep in mind that I haven't started hormones yet, not sure how to get around that over here, how much , I'm still insecure and a bit terrified of looking bad. I'm new at this.)
So I have been dieting, mostly just reducing my caloric intake, nothing really being "forbidden" as long as I don't go over my daily rate. It's been great, too early to really tell any change, but don't really feel starved and I succesfully cut sugars and flours. I accept any tips about this, but this isn't the main topic.
The thing is about exercise, I'm really sedentary and I know that start is going to be hard, but that isn't the setback: I don't want to develop any significant muscle that would make me look any more masculine (my slightly wide shoulders are enough, thanks). I just want to be like, healthtily thin, lean, the physique some feminine male cosplayers have so they can look nice as a female characters ( as much as my "skeleton structur"e allows, of course). I realize this is kind of irrational, but that's why I came here to ask, because google offers many contradictory answers about the topic.
What kind exercise can I do? What would be a starting routine to start this process? I have a pretty good ellyptical at home but not enough budget for a gym subscription.
Thanks in advance, sorry for the long post!
submitted by
GrennTerius to
trans [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:43 GrennTerius Best type of exercises (diet?) for a thin and feminine body?
Hi, AMAB here, I'm working towards using long dresses and skirts in the future (I don't feel comfortable using revealing clothes for now, either masc or femme). I'm fat but fairly tall, which helps concealing some of my obesity, but I think will not look good on those clothes as long as I mantain this kind of weight. Some plus sized people look really good in that setup, but I think that isn't my case, maybe it's psychological or """genetic""", I don't know, I'm fairly confused tbh.
(Before continuing the read, keep in mind that I haven't started hormones yet, not sure how to get around that over here, how much , I'm still insecure and a bit terrified of looking bad. I'm new at this.)
So I have been dieting, mostly just reducing my caloric intake, nothing really being "forbidden" as long as I don't go over my daily rate. It's been great, too early to really tell any change, but don't really feel starved and I succesfully cut sugars and flours. I accept any tips about this, but this isn't the main topic.
The thing is about exercise, I'm really sedentary and I know that start is going to be hard, but that isn't the setback: I don't want to develop any significant muscle that would make me look any more masculine (my slightly wide shoulders are enough, thanks). I just want to be like, healthtily thin, lean, the physique some feminine male cosplayers have so they can look nice as a female characters ( as much as my "skeleton structur"e allows, of course). I realize this is kind of irrational, but that's why I came here to ask, because google offers many contradictory answers about the topic.
What kind exercise can I do? What would be a starting routine to start this process? I have a pretty good ellyptical at home but not enough budget for a gym subscription.
Thanks in advance, sorry for the long post!
submitted by
GrennTerius to
transfitness [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:39 KirDroi Kinds of Dragons
| As someone who has read dozens and dozens of books in the wuxia and fantasy genres, I have identified several groups of dragons that appear in the literature: - dragons-absolute - super beings and gods, have incredible power, can control the fate of the world, are the protectors of the world in which they live;
- dragons that can take on human form - they are intelligent, strong, able to use magic, and love luxury and wealth;
- the wyvern dragons - they are giant winged reptiles (lizards) that can breathe fire and fly, but they are beasts and cannot think like humans.
In the book series "Dragon Heart" by Kirill Klevanski we meet an amazing character, Hadjar, who is a part dragon. He only has a dragon's heart, and that determines all of his future destiny. It's what makes this series truly unique. If you don't know Klevanski's work yet, you're welcome. Please let me know in the comments what kind of dragon you are most interested in. Way to the North https://preview.redd.it/vvi90xwq8x4b1.jpg?width=1438&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d3a04eb5ff8a601b4b1676596e8c2ea3d6bfc23d submitted by KirDroi to litrpgbooks [link] [comments] |
2023.06.09 06:39 Chuckythedolll Not sure what to do in this situation
Hi Everyone, Need some genuine advice, I am 24(F) in a relationship with my co-worker. When we started dating things were going smooth and now after a year all there seems to be is havoc.
I am not going to be an angel and say I’m not toxic, the point is I’m aware I am. But I was wasn’t like this, it is this relationship that has made me like this.
My boyfriend is someone who is super busy and doesn’t like to spend a lot of money. On the other hand, I come from a comfortable family but still have to save up since I want a better future for my self. I don’t think at all when it comes to spending on my boyfriend even if I have to give up on what I want at times.
I like tiny efforts and surprises, it’s weird and stupid but I do. I like when someone surprises me even if it is with a chocolate. I’m not at all asking for big gestures, just small ones. But if I tell that to him he says he isn’t of that nature and can’t change. Whereas I have actively taken effort to change and be better for him. He won’t even try.
He is quite busy and I wait for him everyday to finish work so we can travel together. However, at this point he will cancel plans, make changes and not keep promises at the pretence of work or something. Because of his habit of saving, he won’t make plans so he doesn’t have to pay. I pay for everything. And at times I don’t pick up the cheque, neither does he and then it gets awkward.
Due to all this, I am fighting with him a lot, I honestly don’t know what to do. I know it’s hurting his mental peace but he doesn’t want to leave me. At this point I’m not sure what to do. How do I give myself peace.
TL;DR - frustrated with boyfriend
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Chuckythedolll to
TwoXIndia [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:36 Noodles_fluffy What site to buy wires, specifically JST-GH and Molex Picoblade (at a reasonable price)?
Working on a new project, need JST and Molex cables. The frugal person in me is tempted to buy them from
amazon, because they're way cheaper than any other site like Adafruit or Digikey. I'm not sure what sites I should be looking at, but it feels a little absurd to spend a ton on wires.
submitted by
Noodles_fluffy to
AskElectronics [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:33 DolorasaurasRex 28 - Diagnosed with PCOS after miscarriage. I feel like the universe is against me.
This is going to be a long rant sorry. I'll put the tl;dr here at the start. Spent years complaining to different doctors about symptoms, got consistently different answers. Had a positive pregnancy test 2 weeks ago. 5 days ago rushed to the ER with debilitating cramps and sudden severe bleeding. Roughly 8 hours later was told I lost the baby due to being rh - and oh, I have pcos. In addition to all of that, I feel like no one is helping or educating me on what is wrong with me.
Long version:
Heavy periods were normal in my family. Most of my periods since late teenage years had been heavy and lasted long. I'd been to doctors and was told as long as they came around the same day and lasted about the same time, it was still normal. I rarely have cramps during my periods, and aside from occasionally having extremely heavy flow days or maybe a slightly longer bleeding cycle, it didn't bother me much.
At 19 I had a chemical pregnancy. My then boyfriend (now husband) and I went apple picking in the hills; this was a big deal because it was our first "trip", almost 2 hours from our home town. I had missed my period but only by maybe five days and was excited that our sort of big date wouldn't be ruined by aunt flow. Half way there she showed up anyways... or at least I thought that what was happening. I had mild cramps which was strange but the bleeding didn't stop. I was going through a super tampon and pad roughly every half hour. We made it to the hills, and within 20 mins left. I was too embarrassed to tell him why I needed to go home and blamed it on feeling incredibly sick. What really happened was I had sneezed, and even though it had been maybe 15 mins since I had switch my tampon and pad it gushed so badly that I bleed through my jeans.
I went to the doctor the next day. Found out it was a chemical pregnancy. They did all the "regular tests" to see if there was anything else wrong. Everything came back negative. I was given meds and told to let nature take its course.
Around 22 I started battling my weight. I am 5 foot 1. My healthly weoght is between 115 and 125 lbs. I always did sports so I spent most of my teen years around 130/135, majority ot being muscle weight from the years of softball, swim team, and polo.
My eating habits hadn't changed. But I suddenly kept gaining weight and couldn't lose it. I though maybe it was because I no longer did Phys Ed classes and stopped doing sports. I didn't think I'd hit 165 in just a few months, but assumed it was my fault. I dieted like crazy, started hiking 2 hrs a day, and was able to lose most of the weight and sit comfortably around 145. I never got back to my ideal/healthy weight though. I brought this up to doctors and was told it was my metabolism aging. It was normal. It happened. I just had to adjust my lifestyle and make the best of it.
Shortly after, mostly because I kept demanding answers, I went to an OB who told me I had fibroids. It felt good to get an answer after years of frustration. I tried different birth controls, which helped but also caused other unwanted side effects. More weight gain. Mood swings. Decreased sex drive. Depression. Nothing seemed to be worth it. So I stopped and focused on living as health as I could. Not dieting but chosing better options and eating less. Starting jujitsu. Keeping up with hiking. Things seemed to be balancing out.
At 23 I was in a bad car crash. I was tboned on my driver's side by someone who was trying to turn left into a gas station, going 45 mph. After a couple of days at the hospital, frontal lobe damage, cracked skull,, broken bones, and other minor exteral damage, I fell into a terrible depression. My wrist was shattered so badly that I was in a cast for 9 months. I couldn't exercise. I was always in pain. And almost overnight I went from a healthy-ish (not what I should be at but what I was comfortable at) 145lbs to 165 lbs. Not actually over night but in about a month and a half. I was barely eating because the meds I was on made me so nauseous and completely zoned out. I was stuck inside due to the concussion I had and I was stuck in bed due to other injuries. The bleeding got worse. But I was told it was just the fibroids flaring up.
My periods got worse. They started lasting longer. They were more frequent. I would get one week off and then three or four weeks of bleeding. One time it was a solid 3 months of almost non stop bleeding. I did blood work. Pelvic exams. Went to the OB, my primary care doctor. Moved to a new state. Got a new OB.
At this point my weight gain had gotten even worse. I somehow would drop 10 lbs and gain 10 lbs and then drop 5 and gain 15 over the course of a month. My once thick hair had gotten so thin. It was falling out in clumps. I had bald spots. It was snapping off in places. I did hair masks, oils, viviscal pills. Nothing seemed to help. My depression and anxiety was also getting worse, but after taking pills to feel numb I tried to focus more on natural fixes. Sam-E, holistic supplements, healthy eating.
I told this to my new OB. They did thyroid tests. Diabetes tests. Cancer tests.
And the answer was always, well it's more common than you think to flux in weight. Your blood work looks fine. Sometimes women get heavy periods due to stress. Hair loss is natural with age. Maybe you should change your diet. Work out more.
It was exhausting.
Fast forward to 2023. I got married after 10 years of being with my now husband. We were finally ready to start a family and trying for kids. My OB gave me the all clear, said we shouldn't have anything to worry about. My fibroids hadn't been flaring up. My periods were fairly regular. My dedication to getting healthy was paying off. As strenuous as it was, it was getting results.
I worked hard, lost about 25lbs and got down to 170 last year.
Things were getting better, I was working my ass off. After 5 years I found the strength to join jits again. Even though I had pain and had to be careful with my.old injuries I worked hard to keep up.
Life was getting better.
I've always wanted to be a mom. Since I was little.
When I got that positive test after 5 months of trying it was the happiest day of my life. It had been about 7 weeks from my last period. I had had some light cramping. A day of pink spotting. I could smell things like a blood hound.
The soonest appointment we could get with my OB was a week after the positive test, but I didn't care. I was so happy.
I had adjusted my diet. Fought my sugar cravings and ate only completely natural sugars like fruit. I focused on nutritional food. I did light exercise. I took prenatal, and stopped drinking caffeine. I tried to do everything right.
At the OB the ultrasound didn't look great. They couldn't see much, but confirmed the thick wall was there, and it looked healthy. My blood test came back with healthy levels of p and hcg.
Friday the cramps started. Saturday the spotting started. The cramps got worse. Sunday was the worst day of my life bare none. The cramps pain was unbearable. The bleeding was mind blowing. I was going through 4 super plus tampons in an hour. The pads were the only thing keeping me from bleeding through my clothes every 15 mins.
We spend from about 1:30pm til about 9pm in the ER. I knew at this point what the news was going to be. Blood work was first. It confirmed almost nonexistent levels of HCG. I was told i was rh negative and my body rejected the baby, but i couldnt leave yet. Pelvic exam was next. They couldn't give me any answers on why they were keeping me or what else was wrong. After the ultrasound we waited about 3 hours for results. I was told I couldn't leave because they were concerned I might have twisted an ovary and needed surgery.
The news I got back was a million times worse. Both ovaries were covered in a large amount of tiny cysts. I was told I have pcos. Well they were almost certain it was pcos.
I asked questions buy got very few and vague answers. I was told to go to my OB appointment that I had already scheduled for my 7 week pregnancy follow up. I would learn more there.
I went to my appointment yesterday. Again got very few answers.
I was told more tests needed to be run, and it was hard to do while I was in the process of having a miscarriage. It was probably pcos. I would need to come back in 3 weeks, when I should be ovulating again. I could find out more then.
I feel so lost. I did my own research and finally things started to make sense.
The symptoms were lining up. Things I never even considered being related to each other.
The obvious ones were irregular periods, thinning hair, difficulty losing weight.
However it was the smaller symptoms that made it all click. My sleep habits had gotten very poor. I had trouble falling and staying asleep. I had darkening skin in my elbows, knees, armpits, private areas. Headaches which seemed to get worse around my ovulation time. Unexplained fatigue.
I feel so hopeless. I feel like no one is helping me. No one is guiding me on how to treat this. Or what to do. My concerns were being brushed off by medical professionals. Most of the information I have I found myself after my ER visit. I feel alone, and defeated, and just tired. I've been unable to muster any energy to do much other than get up, go to work, eat a little, and sit/lay in bed. I know it has a lot to do with the miscarriage, which has been hard, but I feel like the pcos diagnosis has just crimpled me mentally to a point where I don't even know how to function anymore.
Thanks for letting me rant. It feels better being able to put into words these feelings. I'm trying to stay strong and not show this side to my husband. He took the news just as hard, if not worse, than I did.
For those who made it this far, any advice would be greatly appreciated. Where do I go from here....
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2023.06.09 06:32 StringfellowHawkes The cruelest of dreams
For the past 6 years or so, I have had one dream. I remember it well as it is the only one I have. It always proceeds the same way. The ending may change slightly, as well as the setting, but it is always the same. Today however, I had a different one. The cruelest of dreams.
You see, I look forward to that same dreary and desolate place my mind would find every night after consciousness finally leaves me so very much. It is simple and will not take long to describe.
I walk. That is all I do. I walk in fields of freshly bloomed flowers. I walk on the warm sand. I walk on a plain of white. I walk in the dark with nothing but the light from far away stars. I walk as everything blurs around me. I walk while all else is still. I walk in silence. I walk with a barely audible murmur. I walk over the softest fabric. I walk over ancient rock. I walk to wonders. I walk past history, past the now, toward whatever each step is leading to in the future. I walk clothed. I walk naked. I walk and I feel the air brush by me with a caress. I walk and feel nothing. I walk through storms. I walk through wars. I walk past births. I walk past deaths. I walk through memories. I walk alone though. Always. And all I feel is happiness, joy, peace, freedom. And whole.
The ending comes one of a few ways. I just stop and the dream ends. Consciousness returns as does the pain. Or, suddenly there is a mirror appearing in front of me. My own visage howling and cackling with the most evil of laughs. Then my doppelganger suddenly stops his taunt and smiles. The consciousness returns as does the pain. There are a few others but I won’t subject you to those.
And so the day begins. A blur like my dream. Only now the happiness and freedom have gone. Now it is just the pain that rules my reality. I cannot hide from it. Cannot stop it. It blinds me. I can dull it briefly sometimes but it always returns. As it always will, every second in my reality, until the day my heart stops and my brain dies. The pain is the last thing I will feel in that instant. And each day it gets worse.
As in my dream I just walk. From here to there. From there to here. Walking to do this thing I must in a world I wish to escape for that one reason. Walking so someone else doesn’t have to. It is what we all do. We all take each step with some type of pain, somewhere. I go through my day in a fog. Every movement brings more pain. And with each step the weight presses down harder. Tiring me to the point that I start to look forward to when my body gives up and I am back in my dream.
So it was last night as I made that unaware transition from one reality to another. In that semi-conscious fugue between awake and asleep, I think I smiled as I usually do knowing what I may get to experience.
I was myself but at a different time and place. That immediate urge to start walking and get to those feelings I usually have was not there. I was in a world my mind had put together that I was familiar but it was different. It was concentrated. I could see my pasts. So many of them. I could see them so clearly. Not as some vaguely obscure thing I would usually see as I began my walk. Or as I walked past. Not this time. All connected. As if a tour had been arranged for only me.
It wasn’t just the places that were clear. The faces. I actually could see their faces. Friends, family, loves. They weren’t smudges on a camera lens here. They were laughing, talking, living their lives. I could hear words, though I cannot recall them now. I could hear their conversations, crying, yelling, kind encouragement, singing and all those moments each of us hold onto. I could see all this in that moment. This place my mind had made for me this time.
Then I moved. I walked from each little bubble of remembrance to the next. To some of the happiest times in my life to some of the saddest. But in all of them. they were there with me. I can even remember what it was like to shake their hands or hug them or bump into them as you do when you are standing about. I can see the smiles I have such fond memories of. Hear the tone of their voices. See the way they carried themselves. All as I had remembered it in my past. Before I knew it, I wasn’t just walking to walk in peace but living. Or reliving to be more apt. The warmth growing in my chest was indescribable.
I spent eons there last night. All the highs and lows of my life were open to me, even if it was just in this one brief moment I allowed myself. Happiness and joy accompanied by sorrow and pain. But all of this was ok because I wasn’t alone on this journey this time. To be able to see their faces, hear their voices and see their life was buoyant.
I was running through one of my favorite times. It was somewhat controlled chaos on a weekend night. I could feel the bass pumping from the DJ. The crowd was frenzied and joyous as it always was. My family was there. We were all working as one. Not one of us hid the smile on our faces. We all knew those times were something special. That even in the worst parts, we all had each other. I had never, nor to this day, been a part of that. It truly was unique. And I had been a part of it.
This was the last part I want to remember. When I said all those people were there, it was not an exaggeration. Everyone who has been a part of my life. They were all there but there were no differences, no motives, no reason for this, since it was a dream. But that’s how my mind presented it to me. Everyone who I cared about, learned from, chaste or chastised by, friend or foe, those I loved and those I have lost. They were all there. No enmity, no anger, no hate. Just all there enjoying this false moment my mind had built.
I remember the end clearly. In fact it is the only thing I can still see in detail. I remember a voice starting to yell from the other room. I was in a back stockroom taking a break and having a beer. The floor was that kind of polished well worn concrete that is as smooth as polished granite. It is grayish brown. It was cool and the shelves were stocked. I remember being fixated on the floor for some reason because there was nothing in the middle of the room.
The yell turned to a scream. The rest took place in a sort of slow motion. I was moving like normal but with each step, that world my mind had created started to change with each panicked stride I took. Edges became duller and duller, less defined. The Modello bottle I had tossed was sliding and spinning across that floor but had not broken. I watched as the concoction inside foamed out but could see time slow the spread of the spill. I can see each bubble start to form. I see the color of the floor change as the now glacially moving spill became just a blur along with the now colorless floor. I tried to move as fast as I could to the door. Each step slowing and obscuring more and more. I reach the door and open it. It seems to take longer than the eons I have been here already. The scream had become a banshee's wail.
Nothing happens when I open the door. I am in an empty room, I think. There is a purplish light that. Everything has returned to the normal dream. The DJ beat has been replaced by some indistinguishable white noise. There is no definition to this world anymore. And they are all gone.
All the faces. The voices. The laughs. They have all gone. And so I started walking. Tears streamed down my cheeks. I just walked.
The pain woke me and the tears were already there. They had been for some time. They flowed for a long time until I could bring myself to move. And now I wait until the exhaustion takes over later so maybe, just maybe, I can get back to that place. Something tells me I never will though, that I will end up as normal. Just walking. This time however with a small bit of pain to accompany the happiness, joy, peace, freedom and whole. I hope though that I can smile a bit at my new companion. As it means that for one brief instant in whatever passes for my mind, I was with all of the people I have known. For each one meant something. And I thank you for letting me in.
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2023.06.09 06:32 One--Four Rose Quartz Recycler 10mm × @mem0_boro × US only
| 350 shipped obo; features a solid base, juicy color horn, 10mm snug fit, and spectacularly smooth function. If you know Rose Quartz, then you know it's such a spectacular color in person; hard to capture in photos. Pictures and function video uploaded in the imgur link. Dm me any questions 👍 submitted by One--Four to GlassSales [link] [comments] |
2023.06.09 06:32 hevad Friend offering to help me setup software to find categories and items to sell on Amazon. Here’s the catch.
As title says my friend is offering to help teach me his trade secrets to sell on Amazon. The catch is I have to use some of his affiliate accounts to setup Amazon and drop ship analytics scanning saas. He gets $15-20/month from me paying for these. All saas are month to month.
Anything I should be worried about?
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hevad to
juststart [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:31 PushThePig28 Slipping out on steep, chunky runs heel side and worried about it happening in consequential terrain.
So I’ve been snowboarding for a long time now but I’ve been noticing something that’s going to get me in trouble in consequential no fall terrain recently. At the resort I pay no attention to trail ratings/whatever and haven’t found anything scary or second guessed dropping at a resort on ungroomed terrain at whatever they have to offer. That’s not an issue.
Issue arises in the backcountry, mostly in late spring in steeper chutes (45° or so nothing crazy steep) that are torn up. Smooth snow- easy and no worries or butterflies at that steepness either edge. Rough chunky snow- toeside fine. Rough chunky snow on semi-steeper shit like that heelside I’ve lost my edge a few times now where if the line was more consequential where it wasn’t just a butt flop and quick back to my feet it could be a serious injury and sliding down a Couloir in other scenarios. I’m comfortable riding these lines without an axe out usually, but the heelside refrozen chunder is becoming a liability. Confident carving fast and know to sit down chair style but if im trying to power through that chundery snow on steeper lines and going across the fall line at decent speed I’ve slipped out like 5 times now and slapped my butt.
Thinking the weight is just too far back and I’m not committing to staying over my board because of some mental thing after the first time it happened on a bigger line. If it’s steeper than that and im doing slower jump turns or creeping down a Couloir it’s fine but trying to power through the chunder on heels and actually ride it respectably fast is giving me issues.
Anyone encounter this issue or have any pointers? This shit is holding back my riding/confidence on steeper terrain where I can’t fuck up.
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PushThePig28 to
snowboarding [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:25 Throwaway_FgOR Is my first tattoo is falling off?
Hi, I got my first tattoo Monday. Recently, it’s been dry and the tattoo is more light underneath. I don’t know if it’s normal or strange. There’s one part of the tattoo that is flat and smooth while the other is bumpy and flakey. The artist during the session did apply numbing spray due to me flinching too much. The first image is it’s current state and the other 2 are right after I got it. There’s also a picture of the after care in case something isn’t right there.
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Throwaway_FgOR to
tattooadvice [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 06:25 meLikeMonke A Story About Wedding Toppers
For weeks and weeks now, the bakery was tasked with the repair of two wedding toppers, a groom and bride, intricate and beautiful, made entirely out of sugar, sat atop a wedding cake, promised to last forever, just apply hairspray or craft spray after two weeks of drying. They had broken off of their base, which is a problem. They were a symbol of love in eternity after all. The bride called in, came in, and brought the toppers for repair. Over the phone she was told that the damage shouldn’t have happened, and that we would look into it for her.
Flash forward to months later, the husband comes to pick up the toppers. Keep in mind, most of our full sized cake orders are done in a matter of two weeks, being generous with time. But the turn around time starts to make sense when you realize the toppers had to be remade in their entirety. No simple repair as it turns out. But it was still a surprise to the husband that he was being charged 36 dollars. Again, makes sense. Not only have they been told that the damage should not have happened, they were not told that the toppers were being completely remade, forget agreeing to the work, they didn’t know what work was being done. They also didn’t know that they would be charged at all. Money was never discussed according to even my boss.
So you have a situation where work was done and being charged almost entirely without asking or discussion, do you think most people would have the nerve to stick up for themselves in that situation? Even in the likely scenario they would’ve simply taken the broken toppers and preserved them as the not quite perfect mementos they were, had they known the alternative’s cost, they certainly couldn’t go back at this point. They had given the broken figures to us. The only thing the couple could do if they wanted the memories would be to pay the surprise 36 dollars.
My boss, through neglect if I’m to view him in a positive light, scammed his customers out of 36 dollars, then had the nerve to get self righteous about it after when told the husband was hesitant to pay.
He’s either such a jackass he looks stupid, or he’s so stupid he’s a jackass, or very likely he is both, because the man just burned a bridge for 36 dollars, when very easily he could have disclosed the work and maybe even ask for the true price he was so self righteous for not charging without telling.
I’m new to the baking world, there’s a lot I don’t know, but as far as I can tell hygiene rules aren’t being followed. I’m supposed to wear gloves in front of customers when giving them cookies, but I get strange looks when I ask if I should on my own bagging them. I am aware that I’m supposed to let dishes air dry but we don’t have room, so I guess I dry with a mostly clean cloth. At my old job, the work was hard but I was at least supposed to clean my work station before and after. At this job no one mops the work floor every day, no one mops in the walk in every day, and maybe this isn’t fair to point out but my coworkers get their arms covered in buttercream and scrape all the buttercream from their arms into the buttercream bucket. Is that ok? Probably?
The boss screams at me when I write something “stupid” when taking an order, generally when I’m directly quoting a customer (cuz I don’t know what I’m doing. No real training) or when I’m answering a question that isn’t what he thinks, and he’s convinced I’m saying something wrong. Most of the time I haven’t. All of this while I’m on the phone, and before you ask, yes, the customer can hear. I wonder why the business is failing? I wonder why I’m still working there? I wonder if I can really fix a cake being hours late with just pleasant conversation? I’m a counter clerk if that wasn’t made clear. I can’t decorate, I can’t bake, I can only get on the way.
I’d like to think I’m a diligent hard worker. Not who this subreddit was likely made for, anarchic people hoping to gain enough wealth or position to never have to work again. I need something to take up my time or I’d shut down… just… not this. I’m so tired.
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